▶ Your Answer :
Some
people might argue that cars made a greater impact on society than airplanes.
Cars indeed changed human life a lot, facilitating movement from one city to
another. However, in my opinion, airplane had greater influence by
expanding our lives throughout the world. Airplane especially enabled worldwide
economy and people to frequently travel abroad.
First, world’s economy became a lot closer
after airplane became common. Before, countries could only exchange goods by
ships, and it took a long time. Shipping was also not a reliable way to
transport things because it was easily affected by weather conditions and
pirates were threatening people all around. After airplane popped up, people could
transport things within a short time more reliably. Moreover, people can do
business overseas easily. I’ve visited New York twice last year
for my business. Thanks to airplane, the world’s economy is getting closer and
closer. For instance The financial crisis occurred in US has tremendous impact on Korea too.
To
add, people are traveling a lot today, expanding their experiences, thus
fulfilling themselves. Nowadays many people travel abroad and various
experiences expand their view. The exposure to numerous cultural backgrounds
makes people to be more open-minded, and seek challenges. For example, my
parents travel a lot, and especially after retirement, they visit another country at
least once a month. They seem to overcome themselves by encountering numerous unpredicted
situations during the travel and share their experiences with me. It affects me
a lot, thinking that I might also challenge my life by studying abroad or
seeking jobs that might fit me more. Without airplane all these would not have
been possible.
To
sum up, airplane made a tremendous difference in people’s everyday life. The
borders became meaningless because airplane enabled people to visit other
countries easily. Upon this, world’s economy tends to have effects on one another,
making the whole world a small society. People also travel to another country a
lot to have various experiences. These are the reasons why I think that airplane
had much more impact on human life.
점수: 26 약간 장황하다고 보여지는 독립형 에세이라고 볼 수 있는데 전반적으로 보았을 때 설명이 잘되어져 있는 독립형 에세이입니다. 독립형 에세이에서 가장 중요한 부분을 차지하는 것은 설득력 입니다. 지금 이 에세이 같은 경우는 각 부분에 있어서 논리적으로 왜 비행기가 우리 삶에 영향을 더 키쳤는지를 구체적으로 잘 설명하고 잇는 거 같습니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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